To someone who use to tell people I'm her daughter.

Tumblr ♥️

I saw a post about tumblr (forgot who wrote it but I liked it) and I thought I also share mine. I've been on tumblr for a quite long time now..and I love it there. Though I don't make personal post there because my brother is following me and I'm not really comfortable for him to see my unending rant about life and everything else. I always reblog awesome stuff and sometimes I also make some typos, let me share you a few...

© Thousandwordstosay | tumblr

Thousandwordstosay | Facebook page

Sinigang na Sardinas

Yes,you've heard it right..Sinigang na Sardinas.
We're a bit tight now,my brother needs to enroll for his last semester in college and there's so much expenses. So we need to eat and cook what we have at home because honestly, I am so broke right now. And here's what my budget can buy...

Sardines
Tomato
Onion
Garlic
Sinigang mix
Kamote tops(from our neighbor's garden)

Here's how I did it:

• Saute the garlic in oil until slightly brown, add the onions and the tomatoes

• Add the Sardines ,avoid crushing the fish, let it sit for 3 mins

• Pour 2-3 cups of water and simmer until it starts to boil

• Sprinkle the sinigang mix (measure it according to your desired sourness)

• Add the kamote tops until cooked.
  

I only spend 30 pesos and I already have yummy viand! Its good for 2-3 person:) I learn this from my my friends here in Teresa,Rizal. You should try it!

My huge fear.

I been a OB nurse for a year, a Neonatal Intensive Care Unit nurse for a month now.. so no one can blame me if Im so afraid of getting pregnant. I've seen a baby with no skull, a baby whose as small as my palm..I've heard a hundred cry of women giving birth, I've seen the pain in their faces. I know how hard it is to be pregnant and specially to give birth. It scares me. Can I handle that? I love babies. I really do. But just the thought of giving birth makes me nauseous. Can I just adopt? Haha. Of course I wanna have my own kids, but Idont know if I am strong enough for that. I hope so.

Remind me.

Sometimes I forget how much I love you.

I became too preoccupied with everything that's going on with my life that I fail to remember your importance.

I neglect your effort, I cease to consider your feelings.

Then in an instance, I felt that there's somethings missing..

there is a hollow space in my heart,

I stop and think what seems to be lacking.

Then I look at you.

When was the last time that I kiss you.

When was the last time that I glance at you.

When was the last time that I told you that I love you.

You're always there, waiting for me.

Patiently standing by.

Hanging unto me even though sometimes I became lost at my own world..

sometimes I became oblivious of your existence.

Then you smile at me.

It reminded me of everything that I feel for you.

How can I be so stupid.

I took you for granted again.

For days, we haven't had a normal conversation.

I'm always mad, I'm always busy.

But you never left. You hold unto me.

You tried to understand me.

Thank you,

for loving me unconditionally,

for not giving up on me.

And if I became foolish again,

I'm giving you permission to kiss me until I'm out of breath.

Cause I'm sure it'll jog my memory..

Remind me of my feelings for you.

Cause I love you like I never loved anyone before.

Happy birthday Babe:)

Its my loves 24th birthday.

I'm broke but I tried my very best to make it special. So here's a 300 pesos celebration I prepare for him.

Yey to this UFC TIPID Pack. Its only 69 pesos. It already has Pasta and Spaghetti sauce. I just bought additional ingredients like garlic and onion, corned beef, 1 piece of jumbo hotdog and cheese. 

 It was my first time to cook spaghetti and I was happy with the result. He also loved it. Well, he love everything I cook. Maybe he just love me too much to complain:)

 Here's my spaghetti with love.

Then I prepared a special movie night for him.

I set up our living room to look cozy, I hung some lights around the room, lit candles, put some balloons and find a good movie in the laptop.

I completed it with pizza and popcorn.

And instead of wine or champagne, I bought our favorite milk tea for our drink.

He loved it. He was touched by the effort, cause I wasn't usually like this. I love seeing him happy, it also makes me happy. Its becoming obvious how he's changing me because I'm starting to learn how to express my feelings and I am no longer afraid to make an effort because I know he's worth it. 

I love you baby. Happy birthday.

21 month.

Of course I get scared.

What if one day you'll wake up and realized how stupid it is to be with me.

I don't deserve you.

I know that.

But I want you.

You're the very opposite of me.

Your kind, I'm not.

You're hardworking, I'm lazy as cat.

You're calm, I'm harsh.

You're sweet, I'm cold.

Your just perfect.

For me, you are.

I still wonder what did you see in me.

Why are so in love with me? I cannot really comprehend it.

I am not that special, I'm not even beautiful. 

But you treat me as if I am. 

I have a huge attitude problem but you never lose patient with me.

I cant even understand myself but you seem to accept every bit of me.

How did you do that?

How did you made me feel so loved that I started to love myself a little bit more too?

How did you made me see that there's also good side of me?

How did you embrace even the worst version of me?

I know how hard it is to love me. That's why I'm scared. 

But you never fail to remind me, that I shouldn't be.

I use to be cynical about love,

but you bring back my faith in it.

Please bear with me.

Cause I love you.

I want to be a better version of myself because of you.

Happy 21 month babe♥

Tindera.

 Pag wala akong pasok, at walang pera..dito mo ko makikita:

Meryendahan sa Arco.

Tindahan/ Meryendahan/ Bukuhan yan ng tita ko.
Buko juice lang dati ang tinitinda namen dito, pero dahil nasa hi-way sya papuntang Morong, Rizal...malakas talaga kumita. Yun, nakapuntadar na din ng maliit na sari-sari store. Tapos laging naghahanap ang mga costumer ng meryenda kaya yun, nagdagdag na naman.

Burger, Mami, Fishball, Kwek-kwek at kung anu-anu pa.

Minsan taga luto ako ng meryenda, minsan naman taga tinda ng buko.

Laging tanong ko: Lima o sampu?

Minsan pag bumyahe kayo dito sa Rizal at madaan kayo sa may arko na papasok ng Morong, daan kayo.

Masarap at puro ang buko:)

Ansabeee...nurse na,tindera pa!

Gusto kong nagtitinda kasi unlimited buko juice!

Its good for our health :)

Benefits:

Prevents dehydration.

Promotes heart health.

Promotes kidney health.

Fights aging.

Its good for the skin, Ive read.

The Caf Express | Maria Leonora Teresa

Sundate with babe.

Dahil day off nya, I let him sleep until afternoon. Tanghali na kame nakaalis. 

Sa Sta. Lucia Grand Mall kame pumunta. 
We ate lunch at The Caf Express. Grabe, Php149 lang, buffet na. I wasn't expecting too much kasi nga mura lang sya. Wala pa masyadong tao ng dumating kame.

Nagustuhan lang namen kasi unlimited rice. Everytime na kakain kame, 

yun lage ang hanap namen cause we both love to eat.

Ang menu nila: Menudo, fried chicken, Kare-kare, lumpia and more.

I cant say na nadis-appoint ako. Di ko talaga inexpect na sobrang masasarapan ako sa food,
with its price, parang imposible e. Pero okay naman, di na masama.
Though sobrang liit ng drinks na free, na kinailangan nameng umorder na additional drinks,
nabusog naman kame, yun ang importante. I wasn't impress by the food, but it wasn't that bad either.

Tamang-tama lang sa gutom pero nagtitipid :)

Rate: 6/10

After lunch, we decided to watch a movie. His turn to choose one, and he chose 

Maria Leonora Teresa.

I'm not really fond of watching horror movies, matatakutin kasi ako.

 Pero with a little pilit, nag-agree na din ako sa choice nya. 

Its about 3 parents na sabay-sabay namatayan ng anak due to bus accident.

A psychiatrist gave them dolls which looks like their kids, para daw makatulong sa pagmomourn.

It sure help para makarecover sila until magstart na ang mga kakaibang kaganapan sa buhay nila dahil sa doll. May mga secreto pala silang pilit inilihim. Nakaraan na kadugtong ng kasalukuyan nila.

Yun. It wasn't that scary. Medyo nakakagulat, pero di yung tipong mapapatili ka. 

Pero may story. Di lang basta nananakot. Maganda din yung kwento.

Yung effects, carry na. Aminin man naten o hindi, di pa gaanong kaeksperto ang Pilipino sa mga ganun.

All in all, ok naman sya. Magagaling ang artista, in fairness.

Rate: 7/10

Our date ended well. Syempre, dinner sa bahay, kwetuhan. Cuddle and stuff. 

Ika nga nya, kahit saan basta kasama ka, siguradong masaya.

♥

Leche Fail

Its a free day from work, At dahil wala akong magawa, at wala akong makain...Nagsearch ako ng pwedeng gawin. I end up with Leche Puto. Nabasa ko kasi sa isa sa mga blog na pinafollow ko yung tungkol dito. Pero dahil wala din akong pera, kung ano na lang meron sa bahay na ingredients, yun na lang ang ginawa ko. Nauwi sa leche flan. Hindi talaga ko nagluluto. Nagbebake ako, pero aside from cakes and pastries, wala. So pardon me for my failure. Inadopt ko lang yung recipe ng flan sa leche puto.

Eto lang ang ingredients ko.
1 can condense milk, 4 eggyolk, 2 calamansi juice

 Pinaghalo-halo ko lang yung ingredients.

At ang favorite part ko, ang pagkain ng natirang condense milk. Yummmmm!

Nagcaramelize ako ng sugar sa lyanera tapos nilagay ko yung mixture then sinalang ko na sa steamer.
Sinunod ko lang naman yung nasa recipe. But sadly, ganito nangyari:( 

Malambot sya.. Tinagalan ko pa yung salang nya pero ganun pa din. Saka its too sweet.
Yun. Fail. Pero ok pa din naman kasi edible naman. 

Nakain pa din naman namen.
Ulitin ko na lang sa susunod. Baka sakaling makuha ko na:)

Never a failure.
Always a lesson❤

Hold on or Let go?

Yes. Nurse na ulet ako. At sa NICU ako naassign,kaya puro babies ang nasa paligid ko.  Masaya,pero minsan,hindi masyado.

Let me introduce you to Baby X. Due to privacy reason,I cannot post her real name or her face.
1 day old lang sya. She was born early,22 weeks pa lang sya,so halos wala pang 5 months sa tyan. Pero grabe,ang tibay nya,lumalaban. Usually,di tumatagal ng 24 hours ang mga gantong kapre-term,pero sya,lagpas na.  Napaisip tuloy ako... hirap na hirap sya, halata mong di pa sya handa na lumabas sa mundo, kelan ba masasabi kung hanggang kelan dapat pang ilaban o dapat ng ilet go? Di ko naman nakausap yung nanay nya.. pero ano kayang nararamdaman nya? Sa opinyon ko,oo siguro ang hirap mag let go,anak mo yan e,dinala mo ng ilang buwan, minahal mo. Pero mas mahirap na makita syang ganyan,nahihirapan, kakalabas pa lang pero kung ano-ano ng nararanasan. Opinion ko lang naman. Sino nga ba ko para humusga e di ko naman nararamdaman diba. Nakakalungkot lang na sa mura nyang katawan e kung anu-ano ng kotrapsyon ang nakakabit sa kanya. Pero kung sya nga lumalaban,bakit di nga naman naten bigyan ng pagkakakataon. Laban lang baby X,pero pag pagod kana,wag ka mag alala,wag matakot bumitaw, mas masaya sa dun sa pupuntahan mo.  May God bless you baby X.

If I stay

Mia Hall thought the hardest decision she would ever face would be whether to pursue her musical dreams at Juilliard or follow a different path to be with the love of her life, Adam. But what should have been a carefree family drive changes everything in an instant, and now her own life hangs in the balance. Caught between life and death for one revealing day, Mia has only one decision left, which will not only decide her future but her ultimate fate.- Written by Warner Bros.

I watched this movie with my boyfriend, and I cried like a baby in the theater.It was really a tear jerker. Though I kinda know how the story goes, because of its book,it didn't really stop me from feeling sorry for Mia. And of course her love ones. All in all, I like it. Not the usual type of movie I love but it was good enough. The ending just-----agh. I cant say it sucks, because it does not. But you know, it kinda left me hanging. 
Rating: 7/10

Nurse May.

Sorry sa pic, eto lang kuha ko today e.

Yes,first day. Nurse ulet ako for the next 3 months.
I was given a chance na magtrabaho sa Rizal Provincial Hospital.
Mejo ok na yun, kesa naman sa wala diba.

Sa NICU ako naassign, di ko masyadong gusto pero atleast bagong experience.

Babies.Babies and Babies. I love babies kaso doble ang selan.
Kailangan precise lahat ng ginagawa mo kundi konting pagkakamali e buhay ang kapalit.
Though ganun naman sa lahat ng pasyente, pero ang baby kasi e di naman makakapagsalita.
Kahit may masakit na, wala kang kaidi-idea.
Kaya goodluck na lang samen.

Excited ako at kinakabahan.
Antagal kong natengga. Kaya ko pa ba?
Sana. Dapat pala. Dapat talaga.

My Girls.

I only have few friends. Di kasi ako mabarkadang tao.

I believe na mas okay ang konte basta too. 

So let me introduce you to 4 of those few friends I have.

We met up last saturday and it was super fun.

Here's April, Grace and Me.

The guy is my friend's boyfriend and next to him is Clai.

They are one of my closest friends.I met them during college, and sine then we became a group.

I can tell them anything and they wont judge me. Being with them is always fun and whenever I feel bad, they really try to uplift me. They are the kind of friend who will be there for you no matter what and I am blessed to have them.

Pigging out.

Yesterday was my boyfriend's free day, so as usual we had our movie marathon  + pigging out date.

Its my favorite kind of date because I can cuddle with him, talk about everything and of course, he always stuffed me with food.(He knows how foodie I am)

Pepero ! One of my favorite. 

My brother used to give his girlfriend one of this so I got curious and tried it, 

and from then on, I can't get enough of it.

Its a pretzel stick dipped in chocolate and almond. Ahhhh..its heavenly.

 Its always my pasalubong from boyfie:)

This Hungarian sausage sandwich. It was tasty and really big. I forgot that my jaw still hurts when I bought this. Though, I still manage to devour it with numerous tiny bites :)

Barbecue! Its always on our what to eat list. Simply because it delicious and easy to find, there's a lot of Ihaw-ihaw stall in our place. 

Balut, a boiled, fertilized duck egg. Its our favorite street food. It looks disgusting but definitely flavorful. Sipping the amniotic fluid from small hole that you made in the balut is the first part. It taste like chicken soup. Next is the yellow part which tastes like any egg yolk, just softer. And of course, the chick, well, you gotta try it to understand why it is so delectable. Me and boyfie never ate just one balut, we always go for more. Yes, thats how delish it is.

~~~~

I am so damn lucky to have A as a boyfriend. He doesn't care how much I eat, he spoiled me, he remembers what food I love, and he always try to satisfy my cravings. Simple things like this makes me happy.  I don't know what he sees in me, but I'm thankful. 

“People who love to eat are always the best people.” – Julia Child. 

Foodgasm

I'm the kind of person na mahilig tumikim ng pagkain na bago sa paningin..

Yung tipong nakikita ko online o kaya on the street.Here are some of my new food adventure:)

*Yema Pastillas*

I bought this online. Katulad ng pangalan nito, pastillas to na may yema sa loob.

Its yummy but a bit hard, compare sa usual pastillas.
Its not that sweet, but its just not impress me. Medyo nakakasawa kasi ito, di katulad ng ibang pastillas na natikman ko. I made my own oreo patillas dati and it was really good(di naman sa pagmamayabang). Siguro kasi mas gusto ko yung medyo malambot saka masmatamis.
Though mukhang hit ito kasi sobrang daming umoorder. Baka di lang sakto sa taste ko pero sa ibang tao e sakto naman:) 

Rating: 5/10

* Red Velvet Crinkles with cream cheese filling*

I was hooked with this one. Its soft and chewy, tama lang yung tamis and I cant stop eating.Para kasing di ka makontento sa bawat kagat mo, yung feeling na gusto mo pa. Though medyo bitin sa filling, manipis kasi kaya di mo masyadong malasahan. Pero di ko masyado yung naisip nung kumakain ako, it was that good.  Yun, ubos agad. 

Rating: 9/10

Temporomandibular disorder what?

Tinanong ko yung pinsan ko kung bakit nagki-click yung jaw ko whenever I try to open my mourth.Sabi nya baka daw TMJ problem. Syempre ako, ano yun? Sabi nya sa joint ng jaw. Its a bit scary kasi pwede daw akong mag lock jaw, which means I wont able to close my mouth. Arhg, I'm scared and pissed. Wala akong pera para dito. Hay. Bakit ba may ganun pa. There's a chance daw na kailangan kong magbrace or splint. Ayooooko. I find people with braces cute but for me? A big NO. Feeling ko di bagay saken saka feeling ko e di komportable? I dont know, I'm just not fond of it. Pero if I dont have a choice, well, there's nothing I can do. For now, I need to know muna kung anu ba talagang mali saken.
Fingers crossed na hindi ko kailangan ng mga expensive treatment kasi I'm still unemployed:(
Pero carry lang yan. Kakayanin:)

"Hard times are sometimes blessings in disguise. "

Lost.

I'm the kind of person who doesn't know what I want.
I am already a registered nurse, but sometimes, I ask myself..Do I really want this job?
Most of the time, the answer is no. Sometimes, I realized I already became attached to it.




Then I fell in love with baking. I studied at TESDA to learn how to do it. I was obsessed. I baked a lot for a very long time, well, while I'm not working. It also became a business. Me and my cousin decided to  open up an online shop. It is called Sweet Creations. We make cakes,cupcakes, cakeballs and everything that we can. It was a lot of fun. Though because of some issues, we started to be inactive with the shop. But here are some of the products that we made.

I also sell things online like beauty products and fashionable items. And I'm  fond of it. I feel accomplished whenever I see my client happy and my sales is good.

Now, I still question myself. What do I really want to do? Being entrepreneur sounds good to me, I also want to try the pastry and baking world, but how about my career? I studied 4 years and took a hard core exam just to be nurse. There were times that I feel that being a nurse is somehow rewarding because it gives me a chance to help people. Its exhausting but at the same time you'll get use to it and start enjoying it.

I'm 24 and still lost. Its a bit scary but I'm taking my time. I'll do it, all at once, while I can:)

20 months ♥

Its been 20 months since I've decided to give us a chance. I was hesitant at first, afraid that it will be just like my past failed relationships.  I was always so cynical about love, I never believed in it. Maybe because I came from a broken family and I witnessed a lot of heartbreaks. Honestly, even though we're already together, my mind always wonder when will you leave me or get tired of my temper. You get mad whenever I ask you to tell me if you don't love me anymore, assuring me that it'll never happen. And as days goes by, I begun to believe it. You don't just tell me how much you love me, you also show it. Every single day, you proved to me that this isn't just one of those silly love affair, its for real and its for keep. I cant remember when did I start believing, believing in us, and believing in love. I'd been in few relationship, but I never felt this way. I never trusted anyone wholeheartedly. I never plan my future with anyone else, except with you.
What I want to say is... you're different. This is different.You showed me that if I open my heart and bring down the wall that I built, I'll be happier.You made me fall in love. You made me believe in forever again. 

The one that got away.

I'm happy. He's perfect. He makes me happy.
But there were times that I thought of you.
There were so many what if's.

I don't know if I really fell in love with you or I just fell in love with our memories.
Those times when we talk almost every minute of everyday.
I can still remember how you made me laugh, or how you gave me butterflies.
You're sweet, but at the same time, you're a jerk.
I was really into you, though I know its wrong, because you're not mine.
How could you do that? You made me feel that I was the most especial girl even though I know that you're taken. I still cannot comprehend how stupid I was because I let you come closer.

Yes, I almost fell in love with you, I never admit it, but I knew I was falling. That's the reason why I start avoiding you. I remember missing you so much, but I force myself not to communicate with you.

Its been awhile now. Two years? I don't know, I lost count. There were times that I asked myself, what if I let you in? Would you really choose me over her? What if I didn't stay away? What if I grabbed the chance to be with you when you two broke up ? I guess I'll never answer that.

But it was a blessing in disguise. Because I met him. By choosing to let you go, I come across with the most amazing person I can ever be with.
Yes, I loved our memories, but I loved him more now. Yes, I still remember you once in a while but he made me realized that I made a right choice.

I hope you're happy now..cause I am.

Goodbye B.

Places I've been.

I love travelling.I really do. Though most of the time, I cant afford it, I still try to travel with minimal budget. So let me share some of the places I been to. For me, the memories of these travel is my treasure. I may not have material things, but I do know that I've lived my life, I been happy, and I enjoyed every adventures.

Boracay , 2012

I was awed, the place was amazing. I was with my whole family and it was fun.

Ambon-ambon Falls, Laguna , 2011

That was an epic adventure. I cant forget how hard it is to reach the falls, but its totally worth it:)

Villa Escudero, 2011

It was with my bestfriend. 

Ati-atihan Festival in Aklan, 2011

Sorry about my face. And the pose, Oh my, so so lame.

Tagaytay, 2012

It was with my Cabillo Family. One of the best trip I had.

Boracay, 2013

Of course we came back. Who wont, right? :)

Ati-atihan Festival in Aklan, 2013

Lot more fun the second time around.

Tanay Adventure Camp, 2013

I'm afraid of heights , but nah, I only live once so yeah, there.

Hongkong, 2014

It was the best adventure yet. Especially because I'm with my Mom and my love. 

Macau, 2014

It was brief but I love it. 

There. That was some of my adventure and I'm looking forward for more. It is my greatest dream to travel the world, and I plan to fulfill that. 

“Wherever you go becomes a part of you somehow.” 

― Anita Desai